Kripya order karein!

Kripya order karein!
Kripya order karein!

Monday, October 3, 2011

Ek baar se dil nahin bharta

In hindsight, having a second baby is probably the smartest thing I did. Well, it does not entirely counter the-world-is-upside-down-ness of having the first one but once that is done and you are left to sob at what has become of your life, having a second one is, all things told, a Very Good Idea. Before you flush the contraceptive down the toilet (assuming you are getting any in the first place, ha), you should know why.

The first and foremost reason is purely economical. Let's admit it, in the first flush of impending motherhood, we all did some really stupid things and there were some very evil people out there to take advantage of us, some of which rhymed with Pisher-Frice. We bought expensive equipment of all shapes and sizes, bottle-warmers and food-zappers and dabbas with and without lids in all the colours of the rainbow and jungle gym mobiles with matching playmats and very soon, you were contemplating a bigger house. I am sure people wonder why parents start talking of a bigger house as soon as the line turns pink. How much space can a new baby take? You can just bung in into a spare drawer, can't you? Well, here is the demystification all spelt out for you - it's not the baby, it's the baby's accessories. About the time baby is getting ready to blow out the candle on his first birthday cake, you will be coming to your senses. Why on earth did you spend this much money on...all this? Well, the only thing to do is to get another baby and force him to Lie. Down. On. That. Jungle. Gym. Dammit.

Then there is that whole concept of siblings keeping each other occupied. How do they do this? Do they come out singing 'Rakhi ke bandhan ko nibhaana bhaiyya more' from the womb? Do they know that their task as far as we are concerned is to keep themselves out of our hair? Do they love each others company to bits? No, haha, au contraire. The thing is - and this is the pillar on which your parenting strategies should be based - they want the same thing. Always. Be it the end of a cucumber meant to be discarded under normal circumstances or a half-chewed bookmark which they very helpfully took out of your novel or The Kohinoor, they both leap at the same object at the same time with the same intensity and can keep themselves busy drawing parallels between the Kashmir situation and their own. Two parties. Want same thing. What to do? Now, all you need to do is ignore the screams emanating from the playroom. Sort of like the UN.

Third reason. School admissions. Sibling points. Enough said.

Then there is the whole Senior Vs Fachha angle. Look, the first time around you were a babe in the woods. Inexperienced. Raw. Nervous. Bewildered. The second time around you can get the pleasure of looking at the first-timers and shaking your head in pity. People will come up at you and ask in wonder, two- two aa? How do you manage? In response, you can look in the distance, looking like the very picture of sobriety, propriety and piety. These cheap kicks help. When you are clutching at straws, that is.

It is also quite rewarding to press the older one into good behaviour because oh my god, child, you are the didi/bhaiyya...you must/cannot do that! And the younger one can always be asked to emulate the older one if they ever want to achieve the dizzying heights of accomplishment on display at that level. One day, beta/beti, you too will do potty in the bathroom.

Any other reasons why people should go for the second one? Feel free to share.

18 comments:

Shweta said...

Not mustering the courage to have a second one now that the first one is three..When I look at moms with 2 kids, I have a new found respect for them..Women of courage, all !

Sharkara@SensitiveCreations said...

Hi Parul , Such a nice post...I actually have been pondering over this idea for very long now....your post gives a little courage ...may be :)

Dil se said...

Nodding along all your points !! I just had my second one and can verify all the points you mentioned :-)

~Serendipity~ said...

You seem to be one kickass mom :D
It isn't hopefully funny as your label says, it actually is funny :D Have fun with both of them :D Keep us updated with their pranks :D

Living in Gurgaon said...

HILARIOUS!! I have two and couldn't agree more:-)

Anonymous said...

Ha Ha ha looking at your post felt as if you had taken a peek at my house which hosts a 4.5 and 1.5 yrs kids...so so true....in my case the gender is the reverse thats all....maybe we should go for a 3rd one just get the paisa vasool;) What say??

-Bhavani

chandni said...

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Mala said...

because sleep is highly overrated ? And you need to get some use out of those cute onesies that the first one outgrew in 2 days/that you shoved into a cupboard unopened and discovered only six months later ?

Seema said...

for us it was never even a question.. i would have wanted 3 if i had age on my side and extra pair of arms...

gargimehra said...

Good list of reasons! I’m avoiding the topic now that my daughter’s almost four, but at some point in the future I’m going to re-read this post to motivate me further!

Nat said...

one good reason for having a second or more is I see they really raise each other sometimes. watch as they get older.

Choxbox said...

LOL! Brill!

One more reason - so that they can gang up on you!

Kunal said...

Hilarious ! Could not stop laughing....

Vidya said...

Lovely post Parul! In my case,I have twins,so they came as a matched set.As hard as life is with two kids,the cuteness just kills us! I cannot think of a single reason why any parent would not want atleast two kids(yes,misery loves company!)..

mors said...

My kids are of the same age (and genders!) as yours and I so agree with this post. Love your funny writing style. Eonomy so does it. My daughter is forever in her Bhaiya's handed me downs Tees and pants (and ganjees too) :D. And I get this amazing satisfaction from having "fully used" all the expensive baby stuff.

PS - I read you off and on. Leaving a comment the first time.

Anonymous said...

All very valid points.... well said. Most importantly they have each other for company. We grew up with siblings and cousins and met frequently on all occassions. Nowadays cousins are all in diff parts of the globe, parents busy with their work. Having their own sibling will get them their dearest "friend".

Another observation - both kids fight (over the most trivial things), become bitterest enemies, you scold one of them, immediately the other one jumps to his/ here defence, consoles her and tells her "mamma is naughty"..... :-)

Chiniiz n Sugarz Mom.. Swati said...

chanced upon ur blog and read this one as the first post.. a hilarious way to put it!! i have been thinking of doing a post on this topic myself but cudnt hv put the humor into it..
will link this post whenever i write that..
till then i will keep visiting ur blog for more reads..

Anonymous said...

Hey,
well I read your article a little late but could not resist commenting. Well i am an only child in a nuclear family. Trust me till date I feel sad that I did not live a part of my childhood. I missed on all the fights and sibling rivalry.
I am unmarried so I actually don't know the pains, but if I could afford to raise two kids I will