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Friday, June 27, 2008

Shy guy

Not having known or seen too many babies in my life, I tend to assume that what Adi does is the norm, that somewhere he is the average in the law of averages. Now, so far when we have had other kids visit us, Adi has welcomed them brightly by diving under the dining table and staying there till the coast is clear. I of course thought that all kids are overcome by this sort of shyness when company comes a-visitin'. And so when we landed at pre-playschool (and we really need to find an acronym for that place), I thought that all the kids would try to stay close to their parents, stranger anxiety overwhelming their insides. Predictably, that was not the case. A couple of kids ventured forth without as much as a 'bye mom, I will write' and immediately started to form deep and lasting friendships with the other social kids, another little one left mom but did not approach the other kids, instead preferring to do her own thing in one corner of the room and then there were some others like the boy in question, who just refused to leave the mother's side.

We have a shy baby, I informed M, upon our return. Well, that is hardly a surprise given that he is our kid, said M. Huh, talk about yourself, I told M puffing up like a toad, I am very much a social butterfly, thank you very much. He grinned and said nothing. Well, maybe not exactly a social butterfly, maybe a moth? Anyway, M is right. I like to meet a few close friends and family of course and can spend hours gossiping and laughing but I also need a lot of personal, alone time. So I guess, I am partly...err....shy. M is also not exactly reclusive but I don't think you can really find him leading the crowds in fun and games.

So there you have it, we have indeed genetically conspired to give birth to a shy guy.

Maybe he will do some research-type work in some lab somewhere, I said, he definitely isn't cut out for professions that calls for glib talkers who talk nineteen to a dozen to strangers. Will you just relax, M asked. I can't, I said, its my baby's career choice we are talking about. Tad early to be deciding, kids change, he mildly averred but I continued to plot and plan. In fact I all but made a mental list of all the people who are shy but have gone on to do well in life. All would be quiet and then suddenly I would jump up in glee, shouting HRITHIK ROSHAN! or something. All this effort paid off in that I was able to compartmentalize my baby into a nice little box labeled SHY/INTROVERTED.

Armed with this wisdom, I shepherded the lad to PPS yesterday. I have no idea what came over him but on arrival, he let go of my hand and started exploring the surroundings. He then proceeded to stare at the faces of the other mothers and kids in the class, sometimes giving them a goofy grin. All in all, a complete change. Just when I thought that I had it all worked out too. Maybe M is right after all, maybe it is a little too early to tell.

Dude, this parenting thing is not easy.

10 comments:

ιℓℓυѕιση said...

Shy guys @ home at actually BIG chupa rustoms!

I have proof..my younger brother!!

So dont u worry...

:)

Shobana said...

Rather confusing wouldn't you say, these kids? They just do what fancies them, letting us to sweat out all the plans, then throwing it in the shredder with a mear wink of the eye. I don't think he will be a shy guy, Parul...just give him time and he will THE social butterfly.

leaving1302 said...

TODAY and i kid you not ,I had the exact same conversation in the car about nadi with k. we are umm social moths also--- to quote you...and our kid seems to have taken after us. Im not trying out pre-playschool and he goes directly to playschool next year aug inshallah so am hoping there is evolving by then. if not, ill come back to see what youre doing on your blog!

NainaAshley said...

I'm still trying to figure out if Apple is shy or not(at 3 years of age). She is extemely shy on some occasions while on others she can be very chatty and friendly. Yep parenting can be confusing!

Mama - Mia said...

would it matter if he was a shy guy or not??

at 25 across the interview table he WILL sit on the chair and NOT hide under the table!!!

gee! i am sure Adi is saying its not easy to be HER kid dude!! :p

glad he is having fun at PPS!

cheers!

abha

Mama - Mia said...

now i am tempted to read all my comments and wonder what can one interpret!!

but today isnt the day for that!! :D

thanx for dropping by for that looksy and saying nice things!!!

cheers!

abha

SUR NOTES said...

dude, you hit the nail on the head!
this parenting thing...damn tough.

had me rolling on the floor, this post.

Rohini said...

I have two theories on this:

1. Just when you think you've figured out a pattern, the darned kids will go and turn over a new leaf

2. Just when you tell someone about something you've figured out about them, they feel the need to prove you wrong...

Mona said...

i agree completely with ro.
and sigh, neither my husband or i are social moths, not that we're butterflies either - somewhere in between i think, but noo's taken things to a new level - she's a new breed of the antisocial. sigh.

oh new person, let's greet them with...the angry frown face! OR a bout of tears and waaaaaailing.

Anonymous said...

i cant give u a acronymn of that word but the place we live ... we call them toddler grps...where parents accompany their children(age grp 6 mnths to 2 yrs )and they have lots of different activities to do ..